9:19 pm

conversation is difficult
because everything i have to say is uninteresting
because i feel that i am being irritating
and my input is unwanted
because my thoughts are too dark
to be shared
without my mental stability
being questioned.
– b.m

changing perceptions on persons with disabilities

this is something I wrote for an internship.


The literal definition of the word ‘disability’ says; a physical or mental condition that limits a person’s movements, senses, or activities.


To any normal person, this is the only definition that stays in mind. The limit exists and is very real while considering what ‘disabled’ people can do.


As I was reading the very definition of disability, I look at Raju, a dancer and very proud to call him a dancer at that, pulling off the most graceful dance moves I’ve ever seen, from a wheelchair.


The school beside my house has a student Manisha and when everybody says that she can’t read the entire textbook of Biology like the other students do, she sings beautifully.


The entire concept of perspectives on Persons with Disabilities has always been kind of daft. People, with anything in this world, do not like to explore what’s beyond the literal sense of any concept or idea. Most of us, let’s be real, very rarely look at a person with a disability and not be keen on installing the idea of pity in our minds.


It’s as if, the words DISABILITY and PITY are so synonymous with each other but they are also extreme antonyms for very few people who like to consider the fact that every person who exists can do absolutely brilliant things out of their league of judgment by people.


To keep a few thoughts in the circle of changing perceptions of persons with disabilities, I like to go way beyond our regular imagination and theories and put into the theme of thought that; the first step goes in making the word DISABILITY become a strong but not a vague one for everyone around the persons fighting that and the persons themselves.


If not for the opinions in our mind that they can’t do things which ‘normal’ people CAN do, we could go a long way in helping these people find out what they can do with what they’ve been given.


In the cliché of clichés, all we can do apart from avoiding the judgment of these people is giving them a chance to prove themselves. Encouragement plays a very crucial part in bringing out the best in someone and it’s a fair statement at that.


Changing perceptions of persons with disabilities include so many points in this loop of perspectives that it comes back to our main concept of treating the disabilities as the strong factors and the persons with ‘disabilities’ as persons with very unusual but impactful blessings to do things in life with something that has been taken away from them.


5:33 am

i switch off all the lights in the room 

to mute every non living thing


to make sure i’m not disappearing,

that I’m not dead yet

to make sure that it’s so quiet

that the only sound i can hear is my own breathing,

i’m here, i’m here, i’m here.

7:38 am

I’ve skipped three days of college already. I don’t think I can do today. Everything is just so bad at home and I don’t think that even staying at home is going to help me. It’s so suffocating. I can’t go to college because I’m just so our of my mind. And at home, I don’t think I can deal with anyone. 

I don’t know what to do.